


Madman's Carousel

by Harley_Honey_Quinn



Series: Danger Comes in Pairs [1]
Category: Gotham (TV)
Genre: Eventual Smut, F/M, Romance, Slow Burn, Violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-14
Updated: 2019-07-29
Packaged: 2020-01-13 02:49:42
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 9
Words: 21,260
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18459917
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Harley_Honey_Quinn/pseuds/Harley_Honey_Quinn
Summary: Your brother has landed back in Arkham and his new friend there seems to be fascinated with you. You somehow managed to piqued Jerome's curiosity and it seems like nothing will satiate it until he's firmly wormed himself into every inch of your life. Where does infatuation end and feelings begin? Can you even trust this man with your brother, much less your heart?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is part one of a two part series (perhaps three depending on how it comes out) with the Valeska twins. This is my first story written in this "insert reader" format so please if you have any pointers or criticisms please let me know!

The sound of manic laughter echoed down the dingy grey halls as you sat tapping your foot nervously, eyes glancing to the mounted clock. Through the discolored glass you could make out the time; five after three, and you had to grind your teeth to keep from storming back into the halls and demanding just what in the hell was taking so long. Leave it to Arkham to be unorganized in literally every manner- and what was that smell? The fragrance was like if a critter had managed to crawled into the walls and died, with the vague scent of an old fabreze spray in a weak attempt to cover it up. Maybe one of the inmates killed the janitor again, David said it took them two weeks to find a replacement before they cleaned his wing again. Another glance at the clock and you felt ready to flip the room around the empty visitation room. When you were just about ready to storm your way into the nurses’ office for answers the door opened revealing a lanky man shuffling along as a guard escorted him in.  


The guard began securing his cuffs to the metal table between you two and you took the time to study his face. His black hair had grown long, falling in his face like some kind of shaggy dog and his stubble had progressed to a full five o’clock shadow- he had clearly lost his razor privileges. But where his hazels eyes usually stared at the table lifelessly they instead lifted to greet her, shining brightly. A large smile even pulled at lips and suddenly he looked so much more like the young man you knew outside these walls. You sat there dumbfounded, your brother never looked happy during your visits- and why would he? The asylum was as infamous for the mistreatment of its patients as their criminally insane prisoners. Yet here he sat, beaming at you like a child excited to tell their parents about their first day at school.  


“Hey sis,” he grinned wider with a wave though his hands could barely lift off the table with the cuffs. “How ya doing?” Well, that wasn’t the greeting you were expecting either. You took a minute to gather yourself and shake yourself from your stupor before smiling back. God, you missed him.  


“I’m good, David. Busy since the diner lost another server, but good. Everyone says hi,” you said simply, eyeing him warily. “How are you? You seem...happy.”  


David shrugged back as if his disposition was no big deal, like smiling freely in fucking Arkham was normal. “I made a friend,” he admitted, leaning closer. “You’d love him, he’s really funny and the only person here who isn’t a zombie.” There was a shock, usually they liked to over medicate their more “lively” inmates til they only stared out the window like a plant waiting to be watered. It took weeks of raising all hell to get them to change his meds to a normal dosage when he first showed up at the asylum.  


“What’s his name?” The idea of him befriending on of the other inmates made you feel on edge but he just looked so… happy. She hadn’t gotten to see him smile like that in months so maybe they weren’t all that bad if they made him that over the moon.  


“Jerome.” That name didn’t ring any bells in your head, that was a good sign- not a serial killer at least. “You should meet him sometime, or at least, you know, if it was possible.” His smile faltered for a second jingling the cuffs as he waved his hand passively. “Oh! I have a bunch of new drawings I left with the nurse for you. Jerome stole a bunch and paper and shit from the office so you don’t have to worry about getting me supplies.” Oh? The nurse upfront didn’t mention that when you checked in. Most likely they threw them all away, again. At least this new friend was helping him, every time you tried bringing him supplies they always magically “disappeared”.  


“I’ll hang them up all around your room for you,” you promised. You were pretty sure there was at least a wall free for new work. You shifted closer and frowned, “they treating you alright in here? Why do you look like a hitchhiker?”  


David at least had the decency to look bashful as he shifted in his seat. “I got into a fight with an ass, Greenwood. He had it coming, though.” That name did ring a few bells. You recalled a headline about him as the cannibal of Gotham, killing twelve women over the course of a month. Joy. ‘What an enemy to pick, David,’ you thought sourly.  


“I hope you got in a good hit to make it worth the fuss.”  


A snort and shrug, “I stabbed him in the leg with a spork.”  


You knew you had to keep up the look of the disapproving sister but the facade cracked as you let out a harsh laugh at the gruesome confession given so blase. “I’ll count that as a good hit,” you smirked with an eye roll. “But real men use spoons.” You shared a smile over the joke before a cleared throat signaled an end to your visit. It felt like these visits were becoming shorter and shorter as you watch the guard unhook his cuffs from the table.  


“Please stay out of trouble,” you begged softly, offering a small smile to cover the sadness you felt. “Okay? I love you, bro.” He offered a sad smirk at the somber goodbye and nodded his head.  


“I love you too, sis. I love you too.”  


Another guard stepped and motioned for you to step out as your brother was led out of the opposite door. You followed them out back to the front desk where a nurse sat back, shoulder cradling a phone against her ear as she blew a large bubble with her gum before biting into it with an annoying ‘pop!’. You looked around, waiting for the nurse to acknowledge you as you waited before waving your hand. Nothing. You raked your knuckles against the desk. Nothing. “Excuse me?” you frowned, repeating yourself a little louder this time. The nurse turned to cast a scornful glare at you before shoving her manicured finger in your face. “Why I outta-!”  


“You should bite it off, it’s the only way you’ll get her attention. She’s been on that call for hours.”  


To your left stood a towering frame pressing his face against the fence that separated you from the rest of the inmates filling the rec room behind him. His hair was a fiery red that matched his almost manic vibrant smile that stretched across his face as you turned to take him in. He looked young, around his early twenties and oozing with charm despite how the sense that was just a wrongness about him. He spoke like you were hanging on every word, like he was telling some grand story with that disturbing gleeful smile. He reminded you of catching a clown without it’s makeup.  


By this point you were tired and fed up, your limit had long been past hours ago. Your guard was foolishly down and you found yourself replying without even meaning to. “The thought is tempting,” you muttered darkly under your breath, glancing back at the preoccupied nurse. “But sadly, I left my biting dentures at home to do any real damage.”  


A loud cackle filled the air, breaking the tension in the room like a thunderclap. The nurse besides you jumped as you felt your hair raise in warning, watching the ginger wheeze, slapping his hand against the fence. “Oh-ho, I like you,” he purred, his voice suddenly soft. “You’re as fun as lil’ David said.” You felt every warning bell go off in your head as the ginger chortled again like this was all some big joke. It probably was to him.  


Before you could open your mouth to reply - with what you still weren’t even sure- the nurse cleared her throat, her nasally voice interrupting their stare down as she tore her gaze away from the fence. “Do you need something?” Unnerved, you turned back fully to the desk and filled out the check-out papers, filing David’s pictures under your arm as you took back your bag. When you turned to leave you risked one last glance back to the fence but he was gone.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Warnings for some mentions of rape and violence. Jerome isn't in this chapter but he'll be back soon. Again, any criticism is welcome, I'm kind of just whacking at this thing blindly.

Foster homes were a bitch even in the best of situations. They were always overstuffed with more mouths to feed than beds to lay in, pretending like you were part of some big happy family with virtual strangers. The kids were mean, the adults worse, you were just a number in the system as you hopped from foster home to foster home. The routine was isolating for any child but you were lucky, you had David. Child Protective Services learned quickly always place you in the same homes the first time they split you up. You wondered if that caseworker still had that scar from David's Barney pen.

Of course, it didn't save either of you from the daily horrors of being cogs stuck in the machine. You still knew went to school with busted lips from your new "siblings", still knew what hunger felt like when there wasn't enough food to go around. But facing them together made them that much more bearable. You became each other's rock when the future seemed bleak, a reason to push through every curve ball thrown at you. To David the rest of the world didn't matter as long as you two were together, ready to let it burn as long as you were safe. He had less of a reason to trust the world outside of your tiny family, bitter to hand he was dealt. In David was a ball of rage and energy that lashed at out even at an early age. He was disgruntled at society for abandoning him to such broken homes, to shoving him in corners to be forgotten when he just wanted love. You knew he only needed a tender hand to calm his inner turmoil but each and every time he was labeled a "problem child" and ignored. So he took his anger out on the parents, teachers, bullies. Your caseworker was worried there wasn't anyone he hadn't bitten, kicked, or hit.

But who could blame him? At school he was punished and screamed at for acting out in a cry for help and at home he was beat for acting out at school. Kids would bully him relentlessly and when snapped back at him violently he was labelled a "monster" and expelled and then punished all over again. It was a vicious cycle that never ended. He was wild, yes, even by foster kid standards but you knew it was only because he wanted so desperately to be wanted, loved. So you did your best to be that love and support in his life, offering him solace from an otherwise cruel world. He was protective of you in return, using his volatile temper to keep you safe. It killed him to know that he couldn't keep you safe from when it really mattered. You hadn't told him about your foster dad's nightly visits, terrified that he would cross a line defending you that you couldn't pull him back from. So you suffered for months silently, hiding the marks from him as you scrubbed your skin raw every night in the shower. You never meant for him to find out about your "dad"s wandering hands.

It was when he smashed in his face that night when David first went to Arkham.

He had come into you room late that night to show you a new comic he stole from the library at school and walked in to find you pinned against your bed with your foster dad's pants around his ankles. You could only blink as the next second David suddenly had him on the ground and slamming his fist into his face repeatedly with a sick "thwack". His face looked like mashed ground beef by the time the police came. They tried him as an adult and shipped off despite your plea that it was in defense. You visited every week, making cases to his nurses and doctors of his sanity. It fell on deaf ears. By now the routine of the decrepit asylum was almost second nature to you despite your begging to the GCPD to at least move your brother to a better facility that actually  _cared_ about their patients.

You were starting to wonder if all of Gotham was just deaf.

The recent incident that landed David back behind their rusted bars wasn't even his fault but the police would have none of it, insisting he was a repeat offender and a menace. To the mugger who jumped you? Oh, most certainly, yes, but to the rest of the world? No, you knew your brother and he only snapped when pushed first. But a murder was a murder, even if it was in self defense. 

Luckily your job was understanding and worked around the new visitation hours. David was a chef for a short while at the diner you where you served and despite none of them really knowing him, it apparently warranted a "Get Well Soon" card. They were apparently out of the "Get Out of Jail Free" cards at Walmart. The thought was touching to you none the less, even if David rolled his eyes at it, and made working the shitty job worth it. Yeah, it required to work all kinds of odd hours of the night serving handsy drunks but it paid the bills and didn't require her to strip or work with the mob- and that was kind of a big deal in Gotham.  Currently it was dead in the small restaurant, the dim lighting flickering with an irritating buzz as the mounted clock read 3am. You only had one customer sitting at the counter, a homeless man named Ernie that always nursed a hot cup of coffee for an hour with the change he collected that day.  You liked his company well enough and traded him the occasional free plate of scrambled eggs in exchange. Having at least one customer stake out so late at night made you less likely to be robbed and that was well worth the price of some cheap eggs to you. Besides, he made for at least somewhat lively conversation during an otherwise boring night. Said homeless man watched you and you idly went around the small counter and cleaned, trying to pass the time until your relief showed. "So how's the brother?" he mumbled casually, stirring his spoon in his steaming cup. He always made sure to ask about David even though you were fairly certain the two had never met. He never asked in a rude manner either like others, curious to here about your "danger loony brother"- but to be honest, the topic came up probably only because by this time of night you had both run through every existing conversation topic known to man.

"Good," you shrugged, sparing a glance back at him as you worked. "He's got a new friend."

Ernie frowned into his cup, loudly slurping the hot bean water as he watched you. "A friend? That's kind of a...dangerous place to make friends, eh?"

You hummed lowly as you mulled over his words, you felt the same way but at his comment you felt a spark of indignation shoot through you. It was different when someone else said it because to them David was one of those dangerous friends that couldn't be trusted. "He's got a good judge of character. Besides, he could be like David- misunderstood and just in need of some help. Not all the mentally ill are dangerous," you defended polishing the counter furiously, painting your frustrations on the poor spot of gum stuck against the linoleum.

Ernie, taking note of how you tried to scrub a hole through the furniture, raised his hands in surrender. "Hey I didn't mean anything by it, kid. I wouldn't insult my only source of free food."

A wave of guilt washed over as you realized just how defensive you sounded and flushed a deep red. "First off, we all know the Italian bistro on fourth has been giving you free bread-sticks for years." You sighed and dropped the rag, your shoulders slumping. "I'm sorry. I'm just so worried for him in there, you know? Sometimes I swear he comes out worse than when he went in." Last time he couldn't sleep for days and seemed constantly on edge, like he was afraid every shadow cast was going to attack him. "A bad friend can set him back even further but I hate thinking he's alone in there. Humans need friends, we're not solitary creatures." The man only hummed in agreement. The door jingled as your replacement came in, signalling the end of your shift. As you folded your apron Ernie reached over and touched your hand, gently patting it in a fatherly way. 

"He's tough though," he said decidedly, giving your hand a brief squeeze. "You two are cut from the same cloth, I wouldn't worry about him, kiddo."

You blinked you misty eyes and smiled back. "Yeah," you whispered softly, "he is."

                                                               

                                                                   * * * * *

 

Your apartment was just as you left it when you stepped back in, dumping your keys and bag on the kitchen counter as you fumbled with the lights. The studio was small but it you made do, covering every wall with paintings and pictures until you could barely see the tan wallpaper beneath. An array of unique abstract monsters and childhood memories stared back at you from every corner of the room. David had supplied the artwork while you begged and stole from foster homes to decorate the place with pictures of your smiling faces throughout the years. They weren't always happy memories depicted in the frames- in fact most of them were during your most miserable years- but it was a token of your past together. He looked so different when he was a kid, small and innocent looking when he grinned up at the camera. 

Despite all the homey clutter shoved onto every square inch the home felt empty and barren. There was no combat boots haphazardly tossed by the door for you to trip on, no music blaring from down the hall, you missed the bear hug you received every time you came home. No matter how many times he left for Arkham you never got used to his absence and the void it left.  An empty home was already an unfamiliar sight for a foster kid, you couldn't even remember ever having the bathroom to just yourself growing up. But an empty home without your brother was like stepping into an episode of "The Twilight Zone". Sure, you aged out of the system and were expected to move onto you life alone as an adult but you found you couldn't leave your brother behind, he had no one else. True, you knew it wasn't totally healthy to depend on each other so much but that was why you were so happy to hear he had a friend! Or at least, you tried to be. Leave it to David to finally make a friend and it's in the most dangerous institute in Gotham. You prayed that they were a quiet schizo or something, anything but that manic ginger from earlier. He screamed unstable and while he was charming you had this sinking feeling that he would only lead your brother down even more dangerous paths. 

You flopped back against the couch with a groan, kicking your sneakers off eagerly. A glance at the unmarked to-do list made you groan as your phone nagged from your pocket that it was 5am. You really should do some work but you were just so drained and thought "fuck it", snuggling yourself comfortably among the throw pillows. You let sleep wash over you as your mind drifted off, conjuring images of a cackling ginger clown chasing after you. 


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A return visit to Arkham makes you question your brother's friendship and reveals a dangerous enemy.

You were restless as you stood at the asylum's front desk, tapping your fingers along the plastic border to ease your nerves. Your eyes glanced to the fenced rec room as inmates filed in. Your fingers tapped faster. You shouldn't even be here, you seethed. You were supposed to check out from visitation fifteen minutes ago but the nurse in charge apparently got lost on her lunch break, you assumed. A flash of red in your peripheral made your fingers falter as you looked around frantically for an orderly to swoop in and save you. But no such savior arrived and and soon that same twittering giggle bounced through the room.

"Back again, dollface? And hear I thought I might have scared you off."

You fought to keep from rolling your eyes in exasperation; don't interact, don't interact. 

"Aw don't be like that, David never said you were the shy type!" You continued your feigned search about the room, eyes dancing around his form as if it would burn you to look directly at him. A disgruntled huff followed by the loud slap of hands slamming against the against metal barrier and you jumped, your eyes instinctively flickering to him to watch the gleeful smile stretch across his face. "Atta-girl!" he whistled lowly, like an owner praising a dog. He  _loved_ making you uncomfortable, the little shit. 

You ran your tongue over your teeth in contemplation over your response. A quick look around showed that no one would be coming to your rescue any time soon and you'll be damned if you were going to let him jerk you around. "You just can't go five minutes without attention, can you?" You expected him to get upset but instead his face faltered for half a second before he rolled his shoulders, looking pleasantly surprised.

"I really can't," he admitted with a chuckle, wrinkling his nose. "I blame the circus life, makes ya crave the lime light all the time. Always on!" 

The joke was lost to you as you watched him chortle to himself; just how far was this guy? It made your stomach twist in unpleasant knots to finally admit that this was your brother's new friend. His humor certainly fit the stories David told you earlier and despite how it upset you, you had to admit you could easily see him getting along like glue with the ginger. You're Jerome, aren't you?" you sighed, shifting uncomfortably on the balls of your feet, the only tell that you were on edge. 

"The one and only!" he proclaimed with a dramatic bow and a wink. "And you must be the lovely, Y/N. Truly, your brother left out just how pretty you'd be." His voice dipped low, like a cat purring as it ate the canary as he took in your figure slowly. "Pretty like a god. Damn. Flower," he punctuated each word through his teeth almost violently, giving you the impression that he tended to destroy said pretty flowers as a child. The way he eyed you made your heart race in your chest. It made your cheeks flush like a school girl and yet your skin  _itched_ for his gaze to dart somewhere else- anywhere else- from you. He oozed danger and charisma from every pore, making it impossible to look away from him like some kind of demented snake charmer. Warning bells were screaming in your head to leave the situation immediately, yet you found yourself staying put as you tried to look indifferent. 

"Anyone ever tell you how boring you are?" you asked simply, taking pleasure in watching the smile slip from his face. But it lasted for only a second before it snapped back into place in the blink of an eye, like it was never really gone. 

"Oh, the flowers got thorns," he cooed and wiggled his finger dramatically, ever the showman. "Come on, we're practically family, you and me! Would dear ol' David really want us fighting?"

"He probably wouldn't want you taunting me, either."

Jerome pretended to smile sheepishly at your deadpan, dropping the act with a groan when you gave no reaction. He ran his long pale fingers through his fiery locks and chuckled. "Touche, but can you blame a guy? A beautiful dame comes wandering into a house full of loonies and murderers and you expect a guy not to get all aflutter?" He pressed his face closer, digging the chain link into his cheek like an eager dog watching the mailman go by. "I gotta reckon that you're some sort of crazy too to do that week after week. And me, I just wanna crack open your pretty little head and figure out just how  _crazy_ you are."

Something akin to terror gripped you as your mind raced to find a reply. "I-I'm not crazy," you argue weakly, where had all that bravo gone? "I'm not crazy," you repeat firmly, clearing your throat.

Clearly he bought that act as much as you did as he lifted a brow at you, "That's not exactly a convincing statement there, dollface." 

"I come here for David. It's not crazy to love your family," you huffed, cheeks inflamed. Why were you letting him to get to you like this? Why did it bother you this much what he thought of you? "I'm loyal to my family."

Jerome guffawed at this, the sound bitter like he the very notion of the idea was a joke. "Family means nothing in this world, trust me. Besides," he cocked his head at you again, "is it "love" _that's_ driving you to talk to me right now?"

"I... well, no but-"

"So," he tapped his chin in mock confusion, "you talk to  _two_ murdering crazies of your own free will? You drive up here week after week and talk to the inmates more than the staff...because you're so totally sane? Do I have that right?" He paused, waiting for your defense with wide eyes. But you had none, what excuse could you give for bothering with him twice now? He grinned darkly as he realized he had proven his point. "I thought so."

You could feel yourself shaking with anger and embarrassment that you had let this clown talk down to you and clenched your fists until your knuckles were white to keep from smacking the fence. "Fuck you."

"Mmm maybe later," he giggled, tossing a saucy wink your way. "I'm not so sure my dick will fit through the fence, but why don'tcha press against the fence real nice like and we can try." 

You fought the urge to scream in frustration and bit out, "The fuck do you want, Jerome? I thought you were David's friend so why are you antagonizing me?!"

"Oh me and dear ol' David are friends, he's my right hand man in here! A real chip off the old block!" Jerome's smile fell, for brief moment of sincerity that you swore you imagined as it was gone the next second, shrugging like they were discussing the weather. "You know he talks about you a whole lot. About your past, what your hobbies together, looking after him. A real mama's boy about it really and normally that would annoy the shit out of me-" he snorted, "-just ain't my kind of crowd. But you...you interest me. You ain't some cookie cutter good Samaritan. Good people don't just defend murderers. Normal people would be scared of him, brother or not, and yet you stuck even closer to him, a lil blood and death doesn't faze you." His green eyes flashed dangerously as they bore into your skull, daring you to look away. "I can tell you're not some squeaky clean normie and yet you confine yourself to this dull law abiding shtick as if that's who you are. That's utterly mind boggling!" He laughed, the sound bouncing off the walls around to a near dull roar until he calmed down.

"And you know riling you up is just  _so_ much fun," he purred, wiggling his brows suggestively. "Watching that cute little face turn red is a treat in this joint. Breaks the monotony of shanking guys and what not."

By this point you were ready to howl back at him, even with the nagging horror of his words creeping in the back of your mind. But being afraid was going to help you so you held onto that anger, harnessed it until it was all you could feel. "I'm flattered," you snorted, "but you don't know me, don't pretend to."

"Oh I wouldn't dream of it," he said with a salute, "Scout's honor. Or at least not entirely yet but I will, I'm gonna pick my way through that little noggin' of yours until I know even your darkest secrets."

The idea disgusted you and pretended to lean in close much to the ginger's curiosity. "Oh I'll tell you," you said simply, "I don't separate my whites from my darks." 

A second passed where he simply stared at you and that unnerved you more than the laughter that erupted after, practically wheezing as he clapped his hands with joy. "Oh, I like you, doll face. You just keep me on my toes!" he howled. "We're gonna have lots of fun, you and me."

"Ma'am?" Behind you an orderly finally appeared at the desk, clearly disconcerted with your close proximity to the giggling ginger. "Can I help you?" Grateful for the interruption you spun your back to the fence with a forced smile, like you hadn't been talking to an unstable maniac.

"Yes I need to check out," you confessed, ignoring as Jerome called after you, slamming his hands against the fence. You hastily filled out the paperwork and snatched your bag up, all but jogging out of the asylum.

You could still hear him laughing as you finally made your way out to the cool Gotham air. "See you again real soon, doll! I'll be dreaming of you!"

That night you sat curled up on your couch, legs tucked underneath you as mindlessly scrolled through the channels on TV but you weren't really paying attention. Your head was preoccupied with the thought of Jerome and his mad grin. Just what did he want with you? Was David safe being friends with such a dangerous man? You didn't trust him to not feed into your brother's already volatile demons but didn't know how to broach the subject. He was incredibly stubborn and the minute you said no to something he wanted to do it that much more, probably taking your aversion to his friendship as an offense. You decided you had to handle this with care, be the voice of reason to hopefully drown out whatever insane ramblings Jerome was whispering in his ear.  You flipped the station again, plotting just how you were going to bring up the ginger subject next visitation when bright red letters caught your eye. On the screen a newscaster stared solemnly as text shifted by with the words "Inmates Escape From Arkham" in neon red letters before shifting to show an array of faces. The remote slid from your hand as you watched with dread as David's face flashed across the screen beside a familiar grinning mug. "Be on alert for these seven men and women, they are considered armed and extremely dangerous. Do not approach if spotted and immediately dial 911. Remember, these are dangerous criminals."

Oh god, David what have you done? 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dialogue is not my strong suit so I really struggled with this chapter since I couldn't have them doing anything or reacting to anything outside of each other. From this point on though the conversations will flow a lot better as Jerome and David will now be free and have a lot more to do than just bang a fence or be menacing. And from this point on the story will start breaking a little bit more from the show- no major changes but small things so if you see an inconsistency with the episodes referenced that's why.


	4. Chapter 4

There were some things that you took for granted; that the sun would rise every morning, that the diner of 34th always served burnt coffee no matter the time, that David shared everything with you. But as you sat in the Gotham police station stuck inside the interrogation room, you came to grapple with the thought that perhaps these things you knew as truths weren't as guaranteed as you believed. The idea made the world feel off kilter, just enough that nothing seemed to sit quite right. It was like stepping into a room and sensing there was something amiss but couldn't place the cause, that itch of not knowing why everything felt wrong so suddenly. When did this happen? When did your brother start  hiding things from you? Nothing was a secret between you -especially not something so important like this. Did he think you would stop him? Would you have? You suppose it probably depended on his plan after- where was he going? And worse yet was he leaving you behind?

Clearly the G.C.P.D. didn't believe so, they had been grilling you for the past three hours, convinced you were in on the plan. You wished. The detective, Harvey Something-or-other really seemed to dig into you for answers like he had caught your fingerprints on the cookie jar. You got the impression that he was normally a nice guy, if not overworked, but that never stopped you two from butting heads. You could understand his mistrust to an extent, you knew how it looked from the outside and he was the personal officer you dealt with when tying to plead's David's case. It would only make sense that you would have helped somehow- you were the only visitor Arkham had listed for the past month and the recent interest the manic little ginger had expressed in you did not help your case.Apparently he had murdered his own mom after a miserable like in the circus as her punching bag. Suddenly his jokes made a lot more sense with that tidbit of knowledge. No wonder he wasn't into the whole  "mommy's boy" shtick.

At least the detective's partner -you think his name was Jim- wasn't so convinced of your guilt. He hadn't said much but his sympathetic gaze gave it all away as he let his friend work. You should be grateful for any pity in your situation but it only served to further sour your mood. "For the last time, I have no idea where my brother is," you ground out, rubbing at the migraine forming behind your eyes. How many more tie were you going have to repeat yourself? "He told me literally NOTHING about a breakout or any escape plan."

"And yet I don't believe you," Harvey Something-or-other huffed back, slamming his hands against the table. You had to give it to him, he was determined to break you with his 'bad cop' routine. "You and your demented brother were attached at the hip, I doubt he'd make such big plans without telling you." Normally you'd agree, you lamented silently. 

"Yeah well, apparently we weren't as close as either of us thought," you spat bitterly. "Now you could either keep asking me the same damn questions for another three hours OR you could let me go so I can get on with my life." Which at this point looked like you depending on your good old friends Ben and Jerry to comfort you as you wallowed on your couch watching the TV for updates.

Jim -or maybe it was John?- clapped a hand on the frustrated man's shoulder, signalling for him to back off. "Admittedly we can't hold you without a crime-" Since when did that ever stop the G.C.P.D. before? "-but we will be in touch. For now why don't you go home and get some rest? I'm sure you need it after this." Harvey Something-or-other clearly was not happy with this offer but wisely kept his mouth shut as you stood with a grateful sigh. If they were going to insist for hours they  _had_ to get new chairs. You rolled your shoulders and offered a nod to both men.

"Thank you, I'll let you know if I hear anything." You wouldn't.

"Thank you, stay same Miss Y/L/N," the man offered a somber smile and motioned for his partner to follow to the door. "We'll have an officer escort you home if you'd just wait here a moment." You fought the urge to groan loudly at the order and gave an exasperated smile, you know the poor sap was only trying to help. Cops in Gotham were infamous for their cruelty and corruption, it was touching to see at least one cared even if the last thing you wanted was his pity. He tugged Harvey something-or-other out, shutting the door behind them and leaving you to sit, twiddling your thumbs waiting around. A good ten minutes had passed and you were growing restless, where was this guy-

  _ **Bang!**_

A gunshot rang like a bell through the building, muffled but still loud enough to indicate that it was close. You stood frozen as you waited for any other noise to break the deafening silence. A second passed, two, then suddenly it was like someone set fireworks, a hail of gunshots filling the air. 

You dropped to your knees, heart in your throat as you shoved yourself beneath the table. The door flew open just as you tucked your legs into the shadows, eyes wide in panic. A cop, still green in his years from the look of him, rushed in and tried to slam the door after him but a large man brutish man with wild hair shoved his way in, sending the cop stumbling back. He barely had time to react as the intruder aimed his pistol and fired. The cop crumpled, groping feebly at the gushing hole in his chest with trembling hands as the killer turned and strolled down the hall, more gunshots ringing. You could only watch in horror as the cop grew still, gurgling out his last incoherent words through the blood, eyes rolling back to stare back at you, lifeless. 

You had seen death before, you had been there for both of David's own murders, but they had been in defense and the victims intent on harming you. This man was innocent, maybe even a good man, gunned down in the prime of his life. His death should  _mean_ something to you, should unsettle on some level. Yet your mind was immediately on the gun holstered to his hip, the man it belonged to seemingly unimportant to you. You hoped it was just the shock of the event that brought out such callousness in you, deep down you feared it was more than that. Cautiously, you crept out from beneath the table, eyes constantly darting to the open doorway as you tugged the gun from the dead man's belt. You had kept a gun in your home since you first aged out of the system, despite the laws against it. You barred from owning one as David lived with you, and though the guilt always nagged at you that you so openly broke the law you weren't about to live in Gotham unprotected. Now as you  held the gun and clicked off the safety you were suddenly very grateful for decision- you felt familiar enough with a firearm to at least not drop it if you fired it. Taking a deep breath you steadied yourself against the door frame, scanning the empty hall. Despite three more dead cops lying across the floor the coast was clear. 

You could hear the vague echo of a conversation as you inched yourself along the wall, careful to step over strewn limbs about you. Your knees were shaking as you stopped just before the exit to the prescient's entry way. You paused, gun poised tightly in your hands, for any of other noise. Silence fell for a moment and you relaxed before a loud bang broke the quiet followed by an laughter. Immediately your hair was on edge as you realized you knew that belly laugh.

Oh god, what was HE doing here?

Did that mean David was here too? The image of him gunning down people with that maniac made your stomach churn, he wasn't an unprovoked killer. Or at least, you thought so. Now you weren't so sure you knew that well at all.

Peering around the corner you scanned the room, eyes dancing across every corner for every little threat. Dead bodies littered the floors and desks like confetti at a party an in the middle of it stood Jerome dressed in uniform and covered in blood.  The same man that charged into the interrogation room stood off to the side pointing a large bulky camera at the giggling redhead as he addressed an unseen audience. "Good evening, Gotham!"  he cackled, flinging his arms wide. "We are the Maniax and I arm Jerome, the ring leader of our little group." You pulled your gaze from the pair and scanned the room twice. There was no one else around that you could see, not alive at least, and with a sigh of relief, no David either. Jerome and his goon were far away enough that you could make it to the door if you ran fast enough. If they didn't shoot you in the back, that is. The pair seemed preoccupied enough as Jerome leered into the camera, maybe... just maybe they wouldn't notice you. "Keep your hats cause you ain't seen nothing yet!" Jerome howled as the cameraman put his equipment down to check the footage. Gripping the gun tightly you race out towards the door. You were so close, the handle just past your finger tips.

"Hey there's still a bitch left!" 

You felt your heart stop and pushed yourself forward, grappling for the handle before teetering back as the glass of the door shattered, the bullet whizzing past you. You spun and turned to face your captors, watching as the cameraman cocked his gun and took aim at you again.  Everything slowed down and you could only squeeze your eyes shut, waiting for the impact.

_**Bang!** _

****You heard a thud and slowly opened your eyes, body still tensed as you realized you were unharmed, the man however lay dead sprawled out across the banister and Jerome's gun still pointed at his body. Time stopped as you and the ginger stared each other down. a rare solemn look on his pale face. He blinked and suddenly the trance was broken as you jerked back, taking in what he had actually done. You could have said something, maybe you should have, instead you turned and yanked open the shattered door, dashing out into the streets of Gotham.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's a short chapter but an important one, this marks the shift in Jerome and the reader's relationship. Next chapter will focus on him and David more closely and give a peek to their friendship. The chapter is already finished so I should hopefully have it uploaded tomorrow. <3


	5. Chapter 5

How long you had been running you weren't even sure anymore. You were at least two miles from the station when your knees gave out, the dead man's gun shoved carelessly in your back pocket. You were certain no one was chasing after you but the adrenaline was still pulsing through your body, screaming to keep running, to find safety far from the dangerous clown behind you. 

But he had saved you, literally killed one of his own men when your life was at risk. You honestly couldn't fathom why he did such a thing, as far as you could tell the kid clearly had no qualms with killing and you hadn't exactly been chummy with him before- at least on not on your end. Was it some kind of loyalty to David? Another sick punchline to a joke you just didn't get? He hadn't been laughing though and that was enough to set you on edge. What did that look mean?

You stood on shaky legs, your knees scuffed and bloody from the tumble, not that you noticed. The gun, you had to get rid of the gun before you went home. The G.C.P.D. already didn't trust you, you doubted having a dead cop's gun was going to help your case. You could wipe it clean and ditch it in the alley somewhere but that would leave too many open ended questions if found. Sell it? Too suspicious. The docks? Half the time they didn't even uncover the bodies dumped in the dark waters, much less a tiny pistol.... 

By the time you got home the sun had long since fallen behind the horizon, leaving the street of Gotham empty and dimly lit by flickering street lamps. You were exhausted as you dragged yourself up to your apartment, the stress from earlier and the four mile walk to the docks and back and pushed your body well past its limit. You were ready to toss yourself in your bed and pretend the day never happened, snuggled up under your thick blankets. You had only just closed the door behind you when you noticed the light from the bathroom shining in the otherwise dark hallway. You didn't recall leaving it on this morning and suddenly you wished you still had that stupid gun on you. You paused, hands groping along the wall for a weapon as a tall figure stepped out into the dark. 

"David?"

Even in the dark you could see your brother flash a sheepish smile as you dropped the lamp you had grabbed in your desperate reach.  "Hey sis, didn't mean to scare you, I-"

You launched yourself at his lanky form, nearly toppling the two of you the ground if he hadn't caught you. You hadn't even realized you were crying until you felt his grow damp under you as you buried your face in his chest. "Thank god you're safe," you sobbed, clutching onto to him with shaking hands. "I was so worried..." David sighed and gently held you, waiting patiently for you to come down as he rocked you back in forth in the tiny hallway. "I'm okay, sis. I swear."

"Are you done out there with you're little moment, I'm kind of bleeding all over the counter here," a familiar voice rasped from the bathroom. His voice broke you from your stupor as anger seized you, remembering just exactly  _why_ you were worried in the first place.

"What the FUCK were you thinking?!" you seethed, shoving back from your brother who could only flinch under your pointed glaze. You could hear Jerome cackling as David raised his hands in surrender, trying - and failing- to calm your sudden rage. "A breakout? Shooting up the police station? First off, you're lucky didn't get fucking SHOT, second off- why didn't you at least warn me about your plan?"

David winced and scratched the back of his neck, avoiding your heated gaze. His hair wasn't as wild anymore and he was finally clean shaven, did they mug a salon too? "I didn't know the plan either, none of us did. This guy just kind of showed up and snatched us out of there," he shrugged, eyes glued to the wall to his left. "He said he wants us to make an impression on Gotham and Jerome thought it sounded fun. It was his idea for the broadcast." At this you cut your eyes to the smirking ginger watching the tiff from the bathroom doorway. Oh, you were going to make him pay for dragging David into this mess. "I want to do this, Y/N, it's fun. Besides when has Gotham ever helped us before? Shooting some crooked cops isn't that bad. It's justice, really."

You didn't want to admit how his words upset you. He was sounding like Jerome. "And you trust this guy, the one that busted you out?" you asked lowly, trying to focus on anything else than your discomfort. Did any of them even know this guy? "I just don't want you getting hurt...."

David didn't get a chance to reply as Jerome groaned loudly, waving his bloody hands. "Okay, this is touching and everything but can we get back to why we came here? My face?" he gestured to his nose which was indeed looking swollen and distinctly lopsided beneath all the blood. "David go and grab that first aide kit? Me and the misses are gonna play nurse."

You wrinkled your nose and blinked. "Gross," you and your brother spoke in tandem, Jerome simply shrugged. You expected David to argue but instead he indeed wandered off to the kitchen for the kit, leaving you alone with Jerome. He really must have trusted the loon to have let him get away with that. "Would you mind shoving, ya know?" Jerome motioned to his face.

"Sure thing," you smiled with sickly sweet charm, stepping close to him in the small restroom. "Tell me, how do you spell your last name again?"

The redhead frowned down at you, clearly confused at your question as you gently touched his face, "It's Valeska," he said slowly, "V-a-l-AH!" With a quick jerk you shoved his nose up and back into its place, taking immense pleasure in how he howled in pain. "Aren't cha' supposed to count down?!" You simply smiled and shrugged, dropping your hands.

"Whoops."

He cast a scornful glare as he gingerly touched his fixed nose, "Rude." David only snorted, appearing in the doorway with the kit to toss it onto the counter. "Good luck," he laughed, disappearing back to the living room. You could hear the television click on as the sound of an echo of Jerome's previous speech played while reporters discussed the dangers of the new "maniax". "Hey why did you shoot Greenwood? He was the cameraman, right?" he called from the couch, flipping the channel to what sounded like cartoons. 

You went deathly still as you locked your gaze Jerome's stern one as again, that blank expression settled across his face. He looked like he was studying you, dissecting every breath you made as he spoke. "He stole my line," he said simply, his eyes never leaving yours. David grunted in a wordless acceptance at the excuse and focused back on his show, falling silent. You tore your eyes away to occupy yourself with opening the first aide with trembling hands. He was covering for you, he was lying straight through his teeth with such ease that you almost believed him. So even your brother, his own good friend, didn't know about him going rouge for you.  You couldn't even begin to comprehend why he did this, why he did any of this. Just when you thought maybe you understand his angle he turned it all on its head. Just what was Jerome Valeska playing at?

You tried to steady your hands as you tugged out sterile wipes and began cleaning away the blood off his face around the cuts along the bridge of his nose. You made a point to avoid his gaze as you worked, tugging your lip between your teeth in concentration. The act proved to be ten times more difficult with his piercing emerald gaze staring you down. At least a smile was slowly creeping its way across his face, ever amused at your discomfort. "The cut on your nose is pretty bad," you cleared your throat , all too eager to return to your kit. "I'm going to put a butterfly bandage to keep it together so it'll heal easier."

"I know what bandages do, doll face." He smirked smugly as you fumbled with the package, twisting it between your fingers fruitlessly. "What happened to all that fire earlier? Cat got your tongue?"

You growled under your breath, tearing into the covering with your teeth. You were getting fed up with his little mind games and your own fumbling awkwardness, not to mention the queer feeling you felt in your chest every time you caught his eye. The hell was wrong with you? "Forgive me, I'm not used to bandaging up wanted criminals in my bathroom," you snapped, tugging the bandage over the cut a little too forcefully.

Jerome to his credit didn't even flinch, his eyes still probing your face. "What, ya never kissed David's boo boos before?" he snickered, eyes falling to the dried blood on your knees. "Looks like someone's got some boo boos herself." You flushed and turned away, tossing the waste away in the bin.

"It's nothing Jerome, just some scrapes," you paused, "...from jogging."

His expression told you he saw right through the excuse and instead opened the case back up.  "Ah-ah. I should return the favor, after all we wouldn't want them to get infected. What would David say if he knew I let his precious sister go untreated?" he practically purred, motioning for you to take a seat on the counter. You faltered, eyes flicking between the would-be-seat and the madman currently feigning an innocent smile. You could just walk right out but you reasoned that would just anger him and you didn't know how he'd react, besides David was close by, he wouldn't do something with your brother nearby- would he? You hesitated before pushing yourself up on the edge, legs swinging. "Good girl," he praised, pleased at your sudden obedience as he sunk down to gingerly lift your leg, tenderly cleaning at the blood and dirt with a wipe. He was gentle, treating you like you were made of glass and the affectionate action made your cheeks turn red. 

"You know, doll," he began, lifting the other leg with the same soft touch to clean it. "I wasn't kidding when I said you and I were gone have some fun." He dropped your leg to pull out two simple band-aids, tearing them open with his teeth. "The fact is, kiddo, that we're just getting started and I ain't about to let the fun end." He grasped his your leg again much harder this time, digging his fingers into the soft flesh as he covered the bandage across your knee. "Now it's fun for me either way. I'm an easy to please man. But you..." you gasped as he dug his fingers in deeper almost making sure that you would bruise. "You're high maintenance, I can tell. And well, if you went runnin' off to dear old Jimbo.... Let's just say you won't be having fun, hm?" He switched out your legs, his touch delicate again. "Or you can play along, think of it as a game. One where you get rewards for keeping that pretty little mouth shut."

A sudden spike of rage overtook you and you yanked back your leg forcibly despite his firm grip. "You think I would rat out own my brother?" you hissed. What kind of person did he think you were? You were nothing if not loyal to David. 

Jerome didn't have the decency to look ashamed of the accusation as he shrugged. "I learned a long time ago not to trust that "family forever" sibling love bullshit," he replied. "Besides had to make sure, it's nothing personal, doll. Loose ends and all that."

"Is that why you shot Greenwood?" you asked, voice hard. "Loose ends?"

The redhead took a moment to study you, a funny look crossing his face before he snorted loudly. "Would you rather I have let him put a bullet through that pretty little noggin' of yours?"

"Well no, obviously. But-"

"Then what does it matter why I did it?" he finished simply. He flashed a cocky grin up at you as he ran his tongue along his bottom lip. You don't know why your eyes followed the movement so intently. "Shouldn't you be thanking me anyway? You don't exactly sound grateful, doll. Come on, give me a smile."

You could only glare at him before shooting him a strained smile. You were going to kick his teeth in. "Oh doll, that's not gonna do," he sighed, pushing himself up to stand over you. You were frozen as he leaned in close like he was trying to see every pore in your face, your noses brushing.  "Let's put a smile on that face," he rasped, his voice low and husky as his arms came to entrap you between them, clutching the counter with white knuckles. You could hear your heart thundering in your ears as he pushed his face closer, green eyes still locked on yours as he grazed his mouth across your lips agonizingly slowly. Time stopped for the second time that day as you sat rock still, too afraid to even breathe as he tilted his head, coming closer again as your eyes slipped shut. 

"Hey Jerome we should probably get going," David's voice interrupted from the hall, jolting you from your stupor. Face flushed, you jumped back, nearly falling into the sink as you came to the horrific realization of what just happened, what you let happen. What you wanted to happen again. Jerome spat a curse under his breath and forcibly pushed himself off the counter with a huff.

"Yeah yeah don't get your panties in a twist," he grumbled, clearly frustrated. He threw you a pointed look that spoke volumes of promises of bad intentions and you felt your face grow even hotter before storming out. David came to stand in the doorway, raising a brow between the two of you at the obvious tension. He clearly found the embarrassment and irritation radiating off the two of you to be hilarious.

"You okay there, sis?" he teased, smirking as you flipped him off, hoping down off the counter on wobbly legs. Goddamn Valeska. 

"Fuck off." God, what the fuck was wrong with you? You had let Jerome of all people kiss you? How lonely and desperate were you? Maybe you really did need to go out more, maybe try a few dates or something. "You sure you'll be safe going back?" you sighed, watching your brother grin. At least someone was, you guess. 

"I promise and I promise to visit and keep you in the loop," he reached out and pulled you into a bear hug, pressing his head atop yours. "Try not to worry too much?" You both knew he was asking too much -you always worried over him- but you still gave a small nod in agreement as you hugged him back. Demented ginger aside, seeing him had set your world back where it belonged. You didn't understand his logic in all of this but you were grateful enough to at least know he was okay. 

"You better," you grumbled, rubbing his back tenderly. Green eyes caught your eyes as Jerome watched from the hall. A troubled expression rested on his mug, like he was bitter at the loving gesture. How deep was his aversion to family to openly sneer at a hug? Did his family never once hug him as a child? He noticed your gaze and smirked, his emotions shifting like flipping a switch. He gave a cheeky wink and flicked his finger against David's back to signal to get a move on. "Please visit soon?" you asked softly as he pulled away. 

"I will try," he promised, ruffling your head tenderly. You normally would have huffed at the belittling display but you could only nod, watching the pair climb out the window onto the fire escape. You stood for minutes afterward, watching them disappear into the night to make sure no one saw them. When they were long gone you sighed, rubbing your face. What had you gotten yourself into? Why couldn't you just have a normal life with normal problems?  Grumbling to yourself and utterly spent, you dragged yourself to your room, collapsing on your bed. You didn't even bother to change as you curled up, knocking out almost immediately, totally oblivious laid on your pillow by your head, scrawled in chicken scratch.

_**Be sure to dream of me** _

_**-J** _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I'm not totally happy with the ending and most likely I'll go back and edit it later in the day. I just couldn't find a solid way to bring it to a close? I hope Jerome wasn't too OOC here? I'm trying to find a perfect balance of his insanity and brief moments of humanity in him. Who knew writing murdering clowns was so difficult?  
> Thank you for all the kudos and the comments, it means so much me.  
> <3


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know, it's been 86 years since I've updated but I'm back! I'm not particularly proud of this chapter but the next one I'm hoping will help smooth some of these bumps over. As always, I hope y'all enjoy and I'm sorry for the wait!

You had expected your brother and his new...friends...to stay low under the radar since their big hello to the world of Gotham. You had thought that but apparently you had been very wrong. Within the next week David and even Jerome had come to lounge about your apartment like it was any other normal day and they weren't wanted fugitives. They were lucky enough that the police's visits to your homes were always just timed while they were away (or maybe it wasn't luck but you didn't like to think about Jerome and his terrifying goonies keeping tabs on your home 24/7) and hadn't gotten caught yet, you would gladly cover for even Jerome if it kept your brother out of trouble. You were happy you got to see your brother home again and be able to see him without handcuffs like nothing changed, you just wished he didn't come attached with the manic ginger as a goddamn hip accessory. You had to admit, your fears that Jerome was just using your brother as some sort of pawn in his scheme though did begin to wash away as you watched them; they honestly acted like close friends and god, you hadn't seen David laugh this much in years. In some sick way he really was a good force in David's life, even if not in his _moral choices._ The two were thick as thieves with inside jokes and little secrets between them that they playfully whispered between each other whenever you were in the room. It warmed your heart to see him finally make a friend in this world outside of you, to see him open up and not be rejected for it. And it blissfully kept Jerome busy which you were immensely grateful for.

Ever since that...moment... in the bathroom you have made a point to avoid him at all costs, burning the note left on your pillow in the kitchen sink as if you could burn away the memory of his lips ghosting along yours. He seemed content enough to let you dance around him for now, like he was snickering away at some secret joke you didn't understand. Jerome was a ticking time bomb and you decided you were smart enough to carefully avoid that threat as much as you could. Besides, you told yourself you only let it happen because you're touch starved. You hadn't dated in well over a year and even then it was sporadic and never progressed far. David tended to scare most people away and you couldn't abide anyone who didn't reach out a hand to your brother, no matter his past. But things were different now, David wouldn't be there to threaten your dates with violence if they stepped a toe out of line and you could have the apartment empty at night (for the most part) to have some fun yourself. 

Another cackle came from the living room as you adjusted the mustard yellow sweater over your maroon skirt. It certainly wasn't the most flirtatious outfit but it was the cutest thing you owned, most of your tips from work went to food and rent and paying for David's medications. Still, you thought you certainly looked catching enough and sauntered out of the bedroom with an extra pep in your step. A low whistle came from the living room as you grabbed your purse at the front door. "Wowzah, going somewhere special, dollface?" You flinched and straightened yourself, rolling back your shoulders.

"Yeah, why are you all dressed up, sis?" David joined in, furrowing his brows at your outfit. He didn't see you normally bother to get this dressed up for errands.

Flicking your hair back you looked back at the couch, making a point to ignore Jerome as you flashed David a shy smile. "I've got a date," you admit, shrugging like it's no big deal. "It's this nice guy who visits the diner a lot," you cut in before he can grill for details. "Real sweet, super polite."

"Sounds boring." The ginger snorted from the love-seat, long legs spread wide to make himself comfortable like he owned the damn place. There was a cruel smile on his face, like a schoolyard bully antagonizing one of the grade school kids. If you knew him better you maybe would have guessed at him being jealous but you doubted he cared enough to let such a thought cross his mind. "What, he gonna take you home to meet his mom too? Kiss ya on the cheek at the end if he's feelin' _jonesy_ enough?" he cackled and clapped his hands like he told some grand old joke and you turned to glare at him, your cheeks warm. 

"Fuck off, Jerome," you spat acidly, fists clenched at your side. "Some of us like a little normalcy in our lives."

Another snort. "Keep telling yourself that, toots." He purred, leaning forward, his emerald eyes sparking with mischief. "But we both know that ain't true. You like the danger of the unpredictable, the thrum of adrenaline of kissing with a knife to your throat. You ain't no good girl, sunshine." David shifted uncomfortably besides him, the idea of his sister's love life making him massively uncomfortable. You couldn't blame him, it was making _you_ uncomfortable.

"You don't know anything about me," you said firmly even as your voice dipped to a whisper. He was just trying to rile you up, the little skeeze couldn't let you have a happy moment without stomping all over it. That was all it was you told yourself, even as the words slipped and buried themselves under your skin. 

"Be safe, sis." David finally cut in, trying to end the strange stare off you and Jerome fell into. The man looked like he was trying to burn a hole through your skull, did he even blink? "Are you sure he's safe...?" Uh oh, there it was, overprotective brother has entered the chat. "We can tag along, make sure he keeps in line. I mean, how well do you know this guy?" 

You groaned and tossed your purse over shoulder, trying to rush out of this entire situation and just get to your damn date. "I know him well enough, besides I have my taser if need be. But I won't need it, this guy is old school polite. And like a hundred and fifty pounds soaking wet, I'm sure I can take him."  You defend quickly. David seems to settle a bit at this, at least enough to not put up an argument. You risked a glance at Jerome and frowned, the smile had slipped from his face and honestly the serious look scared you more than his laughter. He looked mad enough to knock someone out, like one of those attack dogs drugged up on steroids and hatred and abuse. Your eyes connected though and the next minute it was like it was never there, all grins and glee again. The sudden change was unsettling and made your heart skip in fear as you yanked the door open. "Don't wait up if you crash over!" You called, "Have a goodnight!" You didn't bother to hear their response as you rushed out of the apartment, eager to get away from that probing green gaze.

By the time you reached the diner your frustration at Jerome bubbled up until your cheeks were flushed red. Who did he think he was? He knew nothing about you or what you liked and he certainly didn't know Barry. Besides, maybe you wanted some of the sweetness, the chance to pretend you life was normal. Barry gave you that. He knew about you brother and didn't even bat an eye about it, believing firmly in the reform of the mental health department. He didn't stop talking to you or stop showing up to the diner, he saw you as some sweet girl in a bad situation. You weren't crazy for defending your brother, you weren't one of the freaks of Gotham. You were just you.

It didn't take long to spot him when you stepped inside, he stood from the booth and walked over to greet you, a smile stretching across his face. And unlike Jerome's the sight was sweet and calmed the once rumbling pit of anger in your stomach to butterflies as he helped you into the booth. "You look lovely," he gushed, cheeks pink as he ran a hand through his soft brown curls. You had the feeling that if he had a tail it would be wagging. "I-I mean you always look lovely," he quickly corrected, fidgeting with his napkin.

You couldn't help but chuckle and reach for his hand, keeping him from shredding the napkin to bits. "Thanks," you smiled, squeezing his hand. "You look handsome tonight too." And he did. He wore a nice button up with a blue tie that matched his big baby blues. He looked like the poster boy for "Boy Next Door" with his dimpled smile and brushed back curls. Honestly, you thought he was leagues above you and had been wondering why he even set his sights on you in the first place.

"Thank you," he smiled again, ducking his head shyly to look down at his outfit. "I wanted to make a good first impression. I know you said you haven't had too many good dates...." He looked back up and cleared his throat, pulling out two tickets from his pocket. "I hope you don't mind my choice of movies. There's this no romance film out and I thought maybe we could see it together." You smiled and took a glance at the tickets, catching the title. It was certainly a romance film, straight from Hallmark.

"That sounds...fun," you offered. True, a bit sappy for you but maybe it was because you hadn't really given them a chance. David certainly never would have allowed any of films like that in the apartment. Apparently that was the right answer because Barry beamed ear to ear at you, eagerly talking about all the good gossip he's heard around the film. You two stayed for a milkshake to split before walking out to the cinemas. Barry offered his arm for you and held open every door for you like you were in some fifties romance. The boy even made a big deal of just holding your hand during the movie which struck you as sweet. In a world that chewed you up and spit you out it felt nice to have one person be so gentle with you, treat you special. He held open doors for you and asked about your life, your family like he was genuinely interested. He was kind, safe and that was a gem in a seedy place like Gotham.

He walked back to your apartment, making you giggle as he told corny dad jokes and bad imitations of your coworkers. When you reached your door you both paused, neither sure on what to do. You waited for him to do or say anything as you shifted on your feet anxiously. "Thank you for the wonderful date. I...I really had a good time," you admitted softly. And you did, much to your surprise. Sure, it wasn't fireworks between you two but he was safe, kind. You felt wonderfully...normal.

 Barry smiled bashfully, hands tucked into his pockets as he flashed his dimples at you. "I did too. You're spectacular, Y/N." He hesitated before leaning closer and you felt your heart speed as you let him. A gentle kiss on your cheek left you blinking at him, a goofy smile on your face before you gently tugged him back, pressing your lips fully against his. He was certainly startled but quickly responded, gingerly laying his hands on you to steady himself. The kiss was soft and pure, romantic and gentle like he thought you were made of porcelain. His hands didn't stray from cradling your hips, so light you were almost weren't sure there. When you pulled away he was smiling like a puppy in love and you couldn't help the silly grin on your face, you felt like two high school sweethearts sharing their first kiss.

You pulled back, smiling softly at him as you reached for the knob. "Have a goodnight, Barry," you whispered. He blinked, breaking himself from his daze and stammered out a his goodbyes before walking back down the hall, looking like he was floating on cloud nine. You stepped into your apartment, a smile across your face as you flicked the lights on. A hand stop you though, grabbing your hands and slamming them back against the door with a loud 'thud'. Your eyes didn't even need to adjust to the dark to recognize the burning emerald gaze burning into your skull. He was lacking his usual cocky smirk to snarl in your face like an angry dog as he pinned you to the door.

 "Have a good time tonight, huh?" Jerome sneered, shaking your wrists in his tight grasp. "Was it everything you hoped for? Romantic? Sweet? _Normal_?" Your mouth fell open to respond but snapped shut, a shudder of fear sliding down your spine. You had pushed and insulted him before but you had never seen him like this, never felt like he was going to rip your throat to shreds with his own teeth. Suddenly, you realized just how dangerous he was and how just how thin of a line you had been toeing before. Your lack of response did little to help your situation as he pressed himself closer, effectively trapping you against the door. "You may try to lie to yourself, sweet cheeks, but _oooohh_ I see right through you," he licked his lips, eyes gleaming as he slid a leg between yours. "You _crave_ danger, that adrenaline rush from brushing your fingers against the flame. You tell yourself you don't, that you're "normal" but you can't deny it. You're not some cog stuck in the great machine, no matter how much you wanna be." 

You wouldn't admit to yourself how your face burned at his accusation and feebly raised your chin in defiance to mask your shaky legs. "Y-you don't know me, Jerome Valeska." He snickered at the weak performance, a familiar smirk curling at his lips. "I'm not some pet project for you to toy with and break. I have no interest in your world or you." 

"Oh no interest you say?" he hummed, giggle escaping him as he leaned his face closer so your noses were brushing. "That's not how I recall it. You seemed pretty uh... _interested_ then, don't cha think?"  You felt yourself stiffen and jerked your head away, gritting your teeth. You were not going to let him bait you. 

"Fuck off, Valeska."

 Jerome laughed again, his body shaking with as he giggled manically, pressing his face against your jaw. "Oh, I like it when you get mean. Soft girls ain't never been my thing," he cooed, running his nose along the side of your face. "But my point still stands. I can fucking feel your motor purring right now, begging to be revved. And you know it too." He dug his fingers harder into your wrists, feeling like he was trying to crush them in his grasp as he rasped against your throat. "Say it." 

Silence.

"Say it, baby doll." He growled, nipping at your jaw again. When you didn't answer he cursed and forcibly tugged your face to meet his, crashing his lips against yours with bruising force. Something in you snapped and you found yourself opening your mouth to kiss him back hungrily, biting his lip. Where Barry's kiss was soft and gentle Jerome's was all teeth and passion like he was trying to consume you. His tongue explored every inch of your mouth like he was memorizing a map as he shoved his leg up higher between your thighs, earning a soft whine as he savagely bit your lip until you were sure you were bleeding.

The wound brought you to your senses and a flood of shame washed over you as you shoved him away while he was distracted, wiping your lips. "Get the fuck out of my house," you spat darkly as he cackled at you. Any anger or violence in him before had washed away as he made a point of slowly licking his lips. "I said, get out!" You grabbed the lamp off the stand and threw it at him, just barely missing him head before it landed with a loud smash across the room. This only sent Jerome into another fit of laughter as he mockingly held up his hands in surrender. 

"I gotta get going anyway; things to do, people to kill, ya know." The cocky ginger winked at her as he made his way to the fire escape outside your living room window. "But don't worry, doll face, this ain't over. Not by a long shot. Oh! And tell uh...Ben? Barley? What's his name I said hi!" He grinned, playfully blowing a kiss at you before disappearing as you readied to throw another item at him. You stood there, waiting for five minutes in case he came back before collapsing on the floor. This maniac was going to be the death of you or at the very least your sanity and love life. You needed to talk to David about this, to maybe get him to find a different friend or at least direct his attentions elsewhere. It was that or you were going to end up in Arkham yourself for murdering the son of a bitch. 

Tomorrow, you'd talk to him tomorrow. Tonight was going to be spent scrubbing yourself clean and getting wonderfully drunk on some cheap dusty wine you kept in the cabinet. You were going to drink away the memory of Jerome Valeska if it was the last thing you did.


	7. Chapter 7

The news was alight with constant coverage over the many exploits and acts of the Maniax for days; from everything like robbery to murder, nothing was left unreported and no detail spared. It was hard to watch for you, to see in gory detail everything your brother was taking part in. It was harder to see the unabashed glee on his face during the footage. It was true society raised him to be like this but it didn't make the knowledge any easier. You always told yourself that your brother was different than the violent criminals in Arkham, that he was really a gentle soul beneath it all. And he was...but maybe he wasn't so different from the other inmates either. Of course, you and David avoided talking about the subject at all costs. You two never kept anything from each other but this group put a wall between you that you worried neither of you would ever be able to tear down. It was awkward, isolating but you both still made a point to act normal with each other, like nothing had changed. You accepted long ago that there was nothing your brother could do that would ever make you stop loving him. Still, you wanted to at least talk to him about his choice in friends, to understand at least why, of all people, he had to befriended a homicidal maniac with no respect for personal space. 

So, you set out a clever trap of some of David's favorite foods of spicy scrabbled eggs and peppers, bacon, and waffles with syrup. He was never more loose lipped than when he was stuffing his face, a trait that hadn't changed since he was a small tyke. He didn't suspect a thing it seemed as he climbed in through the window, eyeing the buffet board set out on the tiny kitchen table like a child in a candy shop. "What's the special occasion?" he grinned, running his hands through his thick black hair. Over the week his face had started filling out from the think gaunt lines he earned in Arkham and his pale skin even had a healthy flush to it. Wherever they were staying clearly he was getting well fed. 

"Nothing. I just had some extra cash from work and wanted to use it on my brother, is that so bad?" you teased, pouring out a cup of coffee for yourself. "Now come on, if this shit gets cold I'm  gonna toss it at you." David narrowed his eyes at you playfully, clearly not fully buying the lie, but the food won out and soon he was across from you, shoveling it in his face like he hadn't eaten in days. Hook, line, and sinker. "So...how did you and Jerome end up friends?" you asked casually, glancing up at him over your steaming mug.

David paused mid bite, narrowing his hazel eyes at you again as he searched your face. He apparently didn't find anything guilty looking and went back to stuffing his face with waffles drowning in syrup. "He came up to me after I got in a fight with that guy, Dietrich, after he stole some of my pictures. He thought it was pretty funny, I guess." You frowned, you failed to see how a fight was funny. "Anyway he offered a hand in getting me new supplies for new pictures. He kept a lot of them too. We just kind of became friends after that."

Well, that revealed nothing. Why did Jerome help him? Why did they end up so close? "What do you like about him?" you hummed, trying a new strategy of attack. "I mean, you've never bonded with anyone else like this before. What makes him different?"

"He understands me," he answered simply, like he was talking about the weather. "He's funny. He's the only person outside of you that doesn't judge me for who I am, he tells me to express myself. You know what it's like finally having someone tell you you aren't broken?" He looked up at you and smiled, shrugging his shoulders. "I know you've told me but you're my sister, you have to tell me that. Jerome just... is a good friend. Even if he's a little wacky." That was an understatement. "I wish you two would get along," he finished, chugging the cup of coffee. "You could at least _try_."

You winced and sat silently, stirring your spoon idly in your mug. You doubted David knew of Jerome's...efforts... at friendship between you two but you didn't want David to think that you were isolating yourself from his new life and risk him pulling away completely. The boy knew how to hold a grudge when push came to shove and the last thing you wanted was to be on the receiving end of that. There had to be some middle ground for all this; a way to keep David happy and put Jerome back in his place. "Wasn't he part of the circus?" you curiously, mulling over your thoughts. "The one in town again?"

"Haley's Circus? Yeah, though he doesn't exactly have found ties with anyone there," David scrunched his face in thought. "They were kind of shit bags. Like our foster parents." OH. Maybe they shared more in common than you thought.

"But he looks like the kind of guy that would like circuses?" Or at least, the horror movie version or the ones at haunted houses.

David paused and cocked his head back in thought, as if searching for the train of thought in the air above his head. "You know, I don't know. I think he does, at least parts of it. Like clowns and the showmanship of it, yeah. Just probably not that one in particular. For obvious reasons." Interesting. 

"Well, what if we hung out together, for you? Got to know each other and call a truce? My treat," you beamed, looking the picture of innocence. "I want to get to know my brother's best friend. He's gotta have at least one nice quality for me to like." David smiled brightly back at you, clearly excited at the idea, and a sliver of guilt stabbed its way into your heart.

"Really? You'd do that, sis?" he grinned, tossing his fork on the now empty plate. 

"If he agrees, sure."

David snorted and flicked his hair back, "Oh that won't be a problem. Jerome has been trying to pick you apart since I first told him about you. And he loves any chance for attention." A shudder slid down your spine but you covered it with a forced laugh, like that was a totally fucking normal thing to tell someone. "I think we're busy today with a bus or something- " Oh joy. God help Gotham "-but tomorrow I'm pretty sure tomorrow Galavan doesn't have anything planned." 

Galavan? 

"Well, tell him to meet me here tomorrow night at seven?" you offered, slapping that sickly sweet smile back on your face. Who was plotting? You weren't plotting, no sir. The picture of innocence, right here. "I think I know of something we'll both enjoy, but tell him to bring a disguise or something. I'm not looking to get arrested for hanging with the prince of the Maniax."

Your brother was none the wiser as he grinned and nodded along happily, "Sounds like a plan! I really appreciate you reaching out to him, sis. This means the world to me." Ow, ow, shove that guilt away. Bury it deep for we have no use for it right now. "I should get going soon, we got big plans today. Gonna be a blast," he laughed, pinching his shoulders together like it was some big joke. You felt dread coil in the pit of your stomach and reached across to grab his hand, still sticky from the syrup.

"Please be careful, bro. All of Gotham is on the hunt for you right now. Don't do anything too...reckless, okay? We know most Gotham police believe in the shoot first, ask questions later motto." 

David paused, staring at your hands before offering a small gentle smile. For that second he looked like the old David you knew, the gentle brother you knew was still tucked somewhere deep in there. "I will, Y/N. We know what we're doing and Jerome's got everything planned out. I'll be safe, sis." He gave your hand a gentle squeeze and stood from the table, fixing his white straight jacket like outfit. "And let us know if the police bother you, okay? I know they've been keeping tabs on you. Well, they were." The sweet smile was gone as he snickered to himself and moved over to give you a tight squeeze. "Love you, sis!" A sloppy kiss to the top of your head and he was off, angling his tall lanky body through the window and out the fire escape. 

You pushed the uncertain feeling in your chest at his reaction and kept yourself busy by cleaning up the dishes and mess. He was still your brother, your closest friend and family, he was just...going through something You should have expected for him to just embrace the chaos he embodied yet you stupidly held hope that maybe he was settle down eventually, that he would get to live a normal life. It appeared he had no interest in one now. You couldn't tell if that was Jerome's influence or if it was bound to happen from the series of unfortunate events that was his life. He always was your crazier half, maybe this was just the logical outcome. Would he become one of those goons mugging people in the alleyways? Or one of the crime bosses that ruled the Gotham underbelly like Cobblepot or Mooney? You tried to picture, sudsy dish in hand, David all dressed to the nines with a gun strapped to his hip like some gangster, his long black hair brushed back in a slick do. The image brought out a snort and you shook the thought away. That wasn't David, you couldn't imagine him having the patience for any boss to even climb the ranks like that. He was an agent of energy and chaos, not business and scheming. You wondered if Jerome became a crime boss if David would follow him but the sheer force of terror that ran through you at the thought of the ginger maniac with that much power made you quickly distract yourself from such thoughts. Gotham was already suffering enough with him as someone else's lackey, you doubted it could survive if he called the shots. 

You spent the rest of the day sprucing up the apartment from the mess David and Jerome ended up leaving in the wake of their visits, taking the time to do a load of laundry and straighten David's room while he was gone too. For every wall that slapped with pictures David and you had made together over the years all over the apartment, David's room was _covered_ in them, not an inch of wall or ceiling left uncovered. The few pictures he had of yours in here stuck out like sore thumbs; paintings of flowers and sketches of people in a sea of monsters and bizarre figures. He had a sense of creativity you were always jealous of and encouraged at every step. You couldn't count on four hands how many times you had bragged about his art and showed off pictures of them on your phone to anybody who would listen (and some who wouldn't). Many eyed monsters and creatures from only the pit of someone's nightmares watched you as you went about straightening his bed and picking the clothes up off the floor. As he liked, everything was in various shades of black and red with some occasional neons tucked here and there, usually decorated with pins and tears and fishnets. You had to admit, at least his style was cheap, all it took was some creative tearing and pins and voila~! A small paw stuck out from under one of these piles, begging to be saved from the mess. Gently, you lifted it up, inspecting the worn teddy bear it was attached to. it was yours from when you were still young enough to cling to stuffed animals, you thought you had lost it years ago. David must have kept it for you, hidden away like precious token of you. Tenderly, you placed the bear on his bead, brushing your fingers along the matted fur atop its head. The brother you loved was still there, his soft side was just tucked away from the world but not gone. You just had to hold out hope that it would win out against the chaos around him.

Hours later and the apartment was spotless and you were curled up on the couch, eating some leftovers for dinner. Barry had called to check in on you and gave you a pleasant distraction from the cloud of worries hanging over your head. You obviously left out your brother's visit when talking about your day which left a rather boring play by play of your spring cleaning but he was excited to hear every part of it. For god's sake, the man even asked what laundry detergent you used. It was nice though, it kept your mind off your brother, his choices, or ginger that had taken to stalking you. He wished you goodnight at the prompt time of eight o'clock and you flicked on the news against your better judgement. On the screen was sobbing cheerleaders and the description of a failed pyro attempt on a school bus by the Maniax.  You stared at the screen for a minute, taking in the girls covered in gasoline, the undamaged bus, the hard ass cop trying to make the event sound super impressive that they stopped them when it all came down to a faulty lighter. 

A faulty lighter and the whole thing went to shit.

You blinked for a moment before snickering. The snickering turned to chuckles and chuckles turned to full belly laughter as the newscaster showed the offending lighter to the camera, holding it like it was some kind of loaded gun. Well, it looked like the plan wasn't a _blast_ after all, you snorted, still shaking with laughter. More like a _dud_.

Hahahaha.


	8. Chapter 8

You considered yourself a smart cookie and someone who generally tried to avoid dangerous situations that weren't necessary. Well, you had until today. You realized chances of the outcome of your little plan today ending violently were pretty damn high, but your sense of pride outweighed your sense of rational thinking so here you were. Besides, you already bought the tickets so there was no going back now. You risked a glance back at Jerome as you two walked through the city. He had come in "disguise" as you asked with a baseball cap and hoodie tuck over top to cover his face. You got the feeling the entire outfit was fair from his own sense of style but the point was to blend in, something you were certain was entirely foreign to the lunatic. It was a shame too, he was certainly handsome and had probably made many panties fall off. If he wasn't the absolute fucking worst you could have imagined yourself on a real date with him. Instead you were on a mission to piss him off enough to hopefully lose interest in you, or at the very least cry. You planned on getting something for your money here. 

"You know if you wanted to take me out you coulda' just asked," he smirked, flashing a cocky wink at you as you led him out to the park. "The carnival sounds real romantic like. What, good ole' Ben not living up to your fantasies?" You felt your face warm and raised your head to shoot him a dirty sneer, he fucking wished.

"Actually, me and Barry are going great. We talked yesterday," you chirped happily, taking pleasure in the scowl that broke apart his signature smile before snapped back into place. "And did I say carnival? I must have misspoken, but I promise you'll like this place even better~" He shot an uncertain look, like he was waiting for you to tug the rug out from under him as you walked. You just flashed your most dazzling smile and grabbed his hand, tugging him around the treeline to the entrance. "Ta-da!" 

Above you stood the fabric sign, weathered and stained from years of use with the chipped words barely visible; "Welcome to Haley's Circus". You watched in real time as Jerome's face twisted and scowled like he was ready to spit out diamonds with the sheer force that he was clenching his jaw. For a split second you wondered if this was actually a terrible idea and he was about to gut you like a pig at the entrance before he began giggling, wagging his pale finger at you. "Hoohoo, you're playing a dangerous game there, kitten." He purred, his smile filled with malice and the promise of violence. 

"What? You're not too chicken to visit the circus, are you?" You challenged, offering your own cocky smile, ignoring the finger in your face. "Here I thought you were the big bad maniac terrorizing Gotham but if you're too scared of a little odd circus than I guess you ain't shit after all...." You cheerfully sang, rocking yourself on the balls of your feet. "That's cool. We can do something more boring for you if you'd-"

"Shut the fuck up, doll face, and give me the fucking ticket." He snarled, snatching the ticket from your hand with enough force to tear it it. You hadn't imagined he would go along and felt a giddy sense of triumph as he all but sneered and scowled in your face before grabbing your hand and forcefully dragging deeper into the circus. He didn't even stop at the ticket stand, just tossing his ticket like a dirty dollar bill at a strip club forcing you to do the same just to keep up with him as he dragged you along. "You got some real guts to take me here, doll. Most people wouldn't be so ballsy." You couldn't tell if that was a compliment or not but you weren't going to let that sour your mood, even as he tried to crush your hand in his grip.

"You said I liked danger, thought I would test that theory," you smirked up at him, wiggling your brows. "Besides, I promised David to try and get to know you, what better way to do that than to see where you come from? Unravel the mystery that is Jerome Valeska."

The ginger, to his credit, didn't immediately rip you a new one or storm out. He instead offered a smile that was more like a dog baring it's teeth than anything else and tugged you closer, wrapping an arm around your shoulders as if you were buddies but with the bruising force of a kidnapper. "Well I guess it's only fair that I show you around, ey punk?" he cackled, shaking you a bit. "After all _everyone_ loves the circus. Now, what's your favorite part?"

You shrugged your shoulders, making his arm raise up around your ears. "Don't know, never been. This is a first for me, ginger. What do you recommend?" He gasped at you, spinning you around at almost break neck speed to look down at you dramatically.

"What kind of person ain't never been to the circus? No,no we're fixing this right now. Jerome-y here is gonna show you all the best spots around," he gave a tip of his imaginary hat and winked at you. You hated to admit it but he was very charming when he wanted to be -which didn't appear to be often around you. Even if they came in the middle of his constant mood swings. "Starting with the games. Follow me, doll." 

You really didn't have much of a choice in the matter as he tugged you along through the crowd to a colorful stall decorated in stuffed animals and twinkling lights. You couldn't tell if that was on purpose or if they just had faulty bulbs. A bored teen manned the games, not even bothering to look up at them as they flipped through a dingy magazine on the counter. Behind them was an arrangement of wooden ducks that jerked and rolled across the wall in rows, or at least you assumed they were ducks, the paint was too chipped to tell. "Five dollars for five rounds," the teen drawled, holding out a hand for the cash. You shrugged and handed them a bill and took the dart gun in exchange, waving it dramatically at Jerome. "Beginners first," he purred, waving his hand for you to step forward. You rolled your eyes and steadied yourself, squeezing one eye shut and aiming. Easy peasy.

Fire.

Miss.

Jerome snickered besides you, taking the gun from your hands as you grumbled. "It's totally rigged, carnival games are known for it." Jerome hummed with a grin and nodded along, firing three shots as he looked at you. Three chipped ducks fell away as you were left to stand there and gawk at him, cheeks coloring with shame. "Okay how in the fuck did you do that?"

"I'll show ya," he pressed the gun into your hands and moved behind you, helping steady your arms as he nudged your feet apart. "Now the trick is to fire on when you exhale, all calm like. Try it," he rasped against your ear. His hips were firmly placed against yours and his hands were the only thing keeping your arms steady as your heart jumped off the rictor-scale. This felt way too familiar, like a scene from the goofy Hallmark or Lifetime movies Barry watched. You would swear that he was doing this on purpose to rile you up but a glance back at him showed no sign of a mocking grin or tease. It was all you. 

Forcing yourself to take a deep breath and forget about the literal madman at your back, you took a second to steady yourself and squeezed the trigger on the exhale. A single ducky went down at your mercy and suddenly you forgot about Jerome as you jumped up, pumping the gun in the air. "Yes! Yes! Suck it, you little yellow bastard!" you cheered, flashing a grin back at the ginger. "Careful there, mister. Turns out I'm a sharp shooter."

Jerome snorted loudly but smiled along, patting your shoulder. "Oh yeah, I'm real scared. Watch out Gotham, she's armed," he teased, tugging you back to his side like a casual. "Now, excuse me but I do believe the misses earned a stuffed animal. Chop chop." The teen rolled their eyes and tugged down a stuffed clown from the string above him and tossed it to you. It was small and cheaply made but it brought a stupid smile your face too and you couldn't help but hug him to your chest. "What, no name? Every good clown deserves a name!" 

You rolled your eyes playfully and followed him back through the crowd to the next attraction. "I never realized there were so many specific rules for just going to the circus," you teased. You looked back down to the clown, all dressed in green and purple with a big red smile stretched across. "How about...pudding? 'Cause clowns throw pudding?"

Jerome deadpanned and rubbed his face like it hurt him to talk to you. "Pies, doll. They throw _pies_."

"Oh." You mumbled and scratched at your pink cheeks. "Then...he is name is Puddin' Pie. Or Pudding for short." The ginger only blinked at you, clearly judging you hardcore for the name. "Fine, then you pick a better name!"

"Gacey."

You blinked at him and contemplated just tossing the doll at that. "You are one seriously fucked individual. But...fine. But the next stuffed doll we get for you I'm naming," you said simply. "And I'm gonna make it extra awful just for you. Captain Sparkle Pants, perhaps." 

He gasped and held his chest dramatically like a proud mother at their kid's graduation. "I _knew_ there was evil in you! My little monster is growing up!" He pretended to wipe a tear from his eye and "blew" his noise against your head loudly. "I'm so proud." You shoved him away with a laugh and walked ahead, taking in all the sights and sounds and smells around you. The place was loud in every form of the word. From bright colors and lights everywhere, to workers calling to customers to come see their attractions, to overpowering mix of cotton candy and popcorn there was no part of your senses that wasn't in overload right now. None of your foster homes ever bothered to take you or David to a circus or a carnival, kids in the system didn't get the luxury to go to such happy places. To your right you noticed a large demon's head rearing it's gaping maw to the crowd. It's eyes flashed red in time with the recorded evil laughter that echoed inside it. Jerome noticed you staring and didn't even give you a choice before forcibly tugging you inside. There weren't the happy place. 

"Woah, woah, I don't think this is such a good idea," you frowned, trying to tug yourself free from his grasp as he pulled through the hollow teeth inside. "I have enough spooky shit in my house from David's stuff, I don't need to see a haunted house full of it." You had never been in one before but the idea a cramped dark room with a literal wanted murderer just didn't settle well in your stomach. What if he wasn't so okay with coming here and thought stabbing you in the dark halls of the haunted house was a good payback?

Jerome rolled his eyes and held fast, keeping you pinned to his side. "Really, you live with a crazy killer and go toe to toe with another but you're scared of a haunted house? Sweet cheeks, I could do a lot worse to you than this place." 

Offended and now ready to defend your wounded pride you straightened shot a glare at him. "Yeah, the difference is neither you or David are scary. Sorry." You watched him huff at you and all but push into the plastic skeleton that fell down from the ceiling. You jumped and stifled a scream, whacking the piece hard enough in fright that you busted its skull clean off its body and sent it tumbling down the hall. The two of you stood there for a minute, staring wide at the disembodied skull down the hall before bursting you rushed down the hall after it, swearing up a storm. Jerome followed after leisurely, hollering and hooting as every time you jumped and screamed at every pop up scare in your search for the skull. By the end of the haunted house you were a shaking mess and he was literally crying he was laughing so hard. He doubled over, pressing his hands against his knees as you spun around at him, cheeks red and looking ready to knee him in the balls. "Laugh it up, ginger. I'm gonna get even." You didn't know how you would but you would.

"Good luck, kitten," he wheezed, straightening himself as he finally died down to chuckling. "But thank you for giving a guy the laugh of a lifetime. For some who acts all big and tough you're a fucking pansy." You didn't reply and turned to stomp away, Gacey tucked safely in your arms. "Aw come on, doll, don't be like that!" he groaned, chasing after you. "Come on, let's play another game, alright? Something you can beat me at." He looked around before grinning and hopping over to a stall filled with stacked milk bottles. "Perfect! Always been shit at pitching." He winked, "Well, with milk bottles, at least."

You rolled your eyes and slapped down another five, taking the ball from the counter. You ignored him and chucked the ball as hard as you could, imagining the milk bottles were his stupid grinning face. The ball flew from your hand and slammed hard into the pyramid with a loud ping...

...and ricocheted off, smacking Jerome full force in the face and knocking him flat on his ass. 

You stared at each other, wide eyed as you came to terms with what just happened. You just took out the fucking Jerome Valeska, leader of the Maniax, with a goddamn baseball and a rigged carnie game. He was going to flip his shit and probably definitely murder you and that should have been the most prevalent thing on your mind but all you could think about how he looked all dazed and confused on the ground like a tipped cow and burst into laughter. The ginger blinked up at you, even more taken aback by your laughter - you don't think he's ever heard you _laugh_ before- before bursting into hysterical laughter on the ground. You both looked a mess, giggling over each other as the poor teen operating the stall just stared at you two in horror and confusion. You lasted like this for a minute before finally calming down and offering a hand to help him up, still giggling under your breath. He hopped to his feet like nothing happened, clearly unaffected by the blow, and took the stuffed llama the poor attendee gave to him in a desperate attempt to just get you to _leave._ The two of you didn't even talk as he just wrapped his arm back around you and led you away, the llama tucked into his jacket for safe keeping. 

"I should probably apologize but holy fuck that was hilarious," you snickered, glancing up at him. "I told ya I would get even."

Jerome snickered and nodded, not even bothered by the slowly forming bruise on his cheek. "That you did and gave quite the wallop. But I got Captain Sparkle Pants out of it so I'm gonna let it slide," he winked. "Besides it wouldn't be the circus if I didn't get a hit or two." The smile slipped off your face and looked up to him as you walked. True, he was a twisted killer and a major pain in your ass but the idea of even him going through the shit you and David did...no kid deserved that.

"Want me to beat them up?" You offered, voice dead serious. "Me and Gacey can take them. Just give me some more baseballs."

The ginger blinked and stared down at you, searching your face for some kind of cruel twist to the joke. When he found none he waved his hand dramatically and plastered another smirk on his face. "Don't worry about that, I already gutted the bitch responsible. I'll get my uncle for it later but gave savor that shit, right?" His smile turned cruel as his voice dipped low and raspy, "first I want him good and scared of me before I come make a visit." You tried to search yourself for any sense of disgust or fear at his words but found none. You couldn't say you felt any remorse for your foster your father when David killed him, you didn't imagine you would feel any if your foster mother bit it either. Did that make you a terrible person? They were humans, the people who raised you, shouldn't you care? "But I appreciate the offer, doll." 

You shrugged and playfully bumped your hip against to lighten the mood, "Where to next, tour guide? I was promised the full circus experience, mister." Jerome chuckled and gently led you over the large tent in the middle of the grounds, making a dramatic show of bowing and offering his hand to help you climb into the bleachers. The tent was filled with people as clowns rolled and flipped around the show circle and above them hung a dangling bars and a tight rope. "Oh, is this where you used to perform?" you teased, watching as he adjusted his hat and hood, making sure his face was hidden. 

"Har har," he snarked, adjusting himself closer to you as more people climbed up the bleachers. "I didn't perform, my mom was the snake charmer though she did more work on her back." You watched a dark look cross his green eyes like he could still see her and nudged him again, offering a smirk.

"What? You're telling me you weren't a clown?" You pretended to gasp. "Could have fooled me." He didn't reply but the dark look was gone again as he pulled out the stuffed llama from his jacket to fiddle with it. He probably grew up tossing those things out by the hundreds yet he held it like it was his first toy. He didn't outwardly show that it was important but you could tell by his gentle grasp before tucking it back in his jacket. The spot lights flickered to life as a ringleader stepped out to the middle of the floor, all dressed in red and gold and white. 

"Welcome, ladies and gentlemen to the amazing marvel of the Flying Graysons! Watch in wonder as they float above like doves on high!" On cue, a man and woman lept off the stands high in the air, catching themselves on the trapeze bars and flipping across to swap. You gasped and sat forward, maniac ginger forgotten as you watched in wonder as the graceful athletes glide across the air. You had never seen anything so breathtaking, so nerve wracking. One the performers pretended to slip, letting go of the bar and you immediately grabbed Jerome's hand as you watched with baited breath as the other performer caught them by their ankles.

"Relax doll, it's all part of the act," the ginger chuckled breathlessly against your ear, squeezing your hand. You blushed and hushed him, eyes glued to the performance. Even Jerome's teasing couldn't bring you to tear your eyes away from the show. The performers flipped and somersaulted down into the net waiting below, lifting their arms high above to the wild cheers of the crowd. You were jumping up out of your seat, clapping and cheering until you were sure your throat would be sore tomorrow. He didn't bother to clap or at cheer but instead sat back and laughed at your reaction before tugging you with the crowd out from the tent. "Come on, princess I got places to be tomorrow, I can't spend all night here in this shithole."  

You pouted but followed after him, making sure to grab Gacey as he led you away. You two were oddly silent as you walked away from the circus back through the park but it felt comfortable and you didn't feel the need to rush and break again with small talk. Despite your better sense of judgement you actually had a good time today and could begin to see why David got along so well with the infamous murderer. Was he still awful and incredibly dangerous? Of course. Did you trust him as far as you could throw him? Hell no. But it was nice to see the other side of the coin, to get a glimpse of the kid before his life spiraled into the insanity it was now. Maybe he would stop his advancements now, he hadn't made a single move or flirtatious or lewd comment the whole night. Somehow, this night felt...special. Tomorrow you two would probably be back to your bickering hateful ways but for now you could savor it. Gotham was even strangely quiet, no muggers or junkies hanging out on the street corners on your way home. It was odd but you couldn't deny that it made the night feel magical, as silly as it sounded, and by the time you reached your apartment door you were smiling up at Jerome like you didn't hate him before all this. "This was...fun," you admitted, biting your lip. "Maybe you aren't the complete worst."

"Oh, my lady honors me with such kind words," he grabbed at his chest and grinned, looking the part of a swooning prince. "But don't let tonight fool you. I'm still gonna make every attempt to get under your skin, doll." Ah, there was the Jerome you knew. 

"I would be disappointed if you didn't," you smirked, leaning back against your door. "Now you better take care of Captain Sparkle Pants or I'm hunting you down. I don't take kindly to shit no good parents." 

Jerome snickered and tugged the stuffed llama from his jacket, booping it against your nose playfully. "I promise that Sparkle Pants shall receive only the best care back at the hideout. Luxurious, he'll live like a king.We can set up some play dates between him and Gacey like good ole' parents," he snickered. 

You rolled your eyes and gently tucked the llama back in his jacket, suddenly feeling shy. "Thanks for...not being an ass tonight. It was fun. Even if you are absolutely insane." You offered a smile, a real one and winked at him as you opened the door and stepped inside. "Have a good night, Valeska. And take care of that shiner." Caught off guard, the ginger blinked at you as you shut the door in his face. You could hear the echo of his laughter in the hall as he walked away. 

And for once you didn't hate it.


	9. Chapter 9

It all passed in a blur, with a cackle and a blade buried in his chest. The crowd gasped and everything fell into chaos as the man - Galavan- crouched over him, whispering words no one could hear. He was still smiling as he fell, like this was some grand joke to him. No one else was laughing if so.

David was screaming in the background, the sound broken and filled with anguish and rage, rattling you as it was all you could hear, pined to the tv screen. No, he couldn’t be dead. Jerome always had something up his sleeve, this had to be another trick. He wanted to get a reaction out of you, why else was he so adamant that you tune into the charity? But he didn’t move, didn’t stir even as the police swarmed the gala. Your brother wasn’t anywhere to be seen on the stage and you threw up a quick prayer that he somehow escaped amidst the shock and tragedy.

News coverage on the infamous Maniax leader played late into the night, showing new angles of his body bag and replaying collection of clips from his exploits and terror on Gotham. His laughter still echoed through the dark room as David crawled in through your window, bruised and scraped up in his run but otherwise unharmed. Neither of you spoke as you held open your arms, holding him tightly to your chest as he curled up his tall frame and sobbed. Neither of you two slept that night. 

 

 

_An explosion of glitter filled your vision, blinding you for a second as laughter erupted around you. You could make out a large faceless crowd watching you as your vision cleared, shadowed by the bright stage lights pointed at you on the stage._

_“Some applause for my lovely assistant~!”_

_Across the stage Jerome grinned at you, his ginger hair parted and greased back like some fop magician. A quick glance down revealed you were indeed dressed in a shimmery pink bodice and fishnets like a Vegas showgirl. You couldn’t remember how you got there or when you changed but in that moment it seemed so normal. Another cheer came from the crowd as you made your way to Jerome who took your hand and tugged you to his chest. You didn’t question why he did it or why it felt so natural to be in his arms and smile to the crowd._

_“Now together we will perform a magic trick! A grand illusion!” Jerome waved his free arm dramatically, a switchblade appearing between his fingers. “Would you do the honors?” he purred against your ear as he pressed the knife into your hands._

_Your smile falters slightly and you want to argue that you don’t remember this trick but he hushes you with a kiss to your brow. The action doesn’t make you jerk away but it also does little to soothe the swirling anxiety in the pit of your stomach. You were crying, begging, pleading to stop the show but it fell on deaf ears as the crowd just laughed and giggled at your panic.You lift the knife clear above your head, unable to control your actions as you swing the knife down-_

 

**Splash!**

You blinked, stirred from your nap as you watched Barry toss another rock into the dark murky water of the pond, the stone sinking with a sad plop. Another sad attempt at skipping stones. You were unsurprised, Barry was sweet but anything even slightly athletic was far outside of his wheelhouse. 

“Shoot!” he swore under his breath, like it was some grand curse word, huffing his cheeks in his frustration. “They make this seem so easy in the movies.” Another stone was sent flying to meet the same end. 

“Bar, you’re not even holding your wrist right,” you teased, rubbing the sleep from your eyes as you sat up. “You have to flick it at the last minute.” 

“He’s never gonna get it.”

You glanced to the tall lounging form besides you, plucking the blades of grass between his fingers. His face was concealed by the hood of his jacket but you didn’t need to see his face to know David was scowling. He had been in a constant foul mood for the past year- that is when you could even get him out of his room. He never laughed anymore and often took out his foul  attitude on poor Barry, an easy target for his fury. You couldn’t find it in yourself to blame him though, he lost everything and was stuck hiding in yours and Barry’s apartment like nothing ever happened. That night… it hurt you both in someway but it shattered David. Watching Jerome crumple, to bleed out before him unable to help… he carried a lot of guilt over it and you couldn’t blame him. 

Surprisingly, Barry was very understanding of David after everything - not that you didn’t conceal some _choice_ details on his exact involvement. He said he wanted to make you happy, opening his home and his friendship to the dark convict. The only downside seemed to be that your brother fought him tooth and nail every step of the way. Barry’s sweet carefree personality only appeared to irritate him and seeing you two romantically involved only made it worse. It was like he was mad at you for “moving on” from Jerome - or more like Barry stealing his spot. You tried to explain over and over again that there was nothing between you and ginger but that seemed to go in one ear and out the other. Every kiss, every hug was met with “when Jerome did this” and “Jerome used to do this”. Barry never understood who Jerome was or why these were pointed jabs but that did little to quell your frustration with him and the situation. He just wanted to get under Barry’s skin but it never worked, the man had the patience of a saint which only succeeded in pissing David off further and the cycle continued. 

“Don’t be rude,” you snapped back, shooting a warning glare at him while Barry’s back was turned. Couldn’t you just have one day of peace from him?

“No, he’s right.” Barry laughed, ever the kind and fair sport. “I never will. Rock skipping just isn’t my forte but that’s alright. I’ll stick to cooking and movie trivia.”

“Exciting.”

You shot David another glare before pushing yourself up from the grass to lay a soft kiss on Barry’s cheek. You could hear your brother pretend to gag in the background as Barry chuckled and nuzzled his face against yours. “Don’t listen to him, your rom-com knowledge is very cool." It wasn’t, you all knew it, but Barry still puffed with pride. “You never know when you’ll need it. Jeopardy one day, maybe.” 

David rolled his eyes but gratefully said nothing as he stood up and brushed himself off. He was clearly bored with the impromptu picnic and ready to go. “I gotta get going. Uh...I’ll be back home later,” he mumbled, checking his phone. A burner you got for him in case you had to split up or, god forbid, he needed help.

“Really? That’s the third time this week, champ.” Barry frowned at him, shoving his hands in his pockets. He knew how David wandering off made you worry and was usually the stern voice of reasoning for you (well, as stern as a man like him could ever be). It only took a single icy glare from your brother to hush him though.

“I’ve got things to do. I promise I’ll be safe.” You two stared until he groaned and raised his hands in mock scout salute. “I promise. I’m not doing anything illegal, it’s like… a group therapy...thing. You wouldn’t understand.” 

You believed that like you believed the GCPD on anything, but didn’t push it. You both had developed coping mechanisms over the past year and his was his, you couldn't take that from him. “Fine, have fun. Be safe, okay? Barry’s working tonight so dinner will just be you and me if you aren’t out too late,” you sighed. You doubted he would come home before the sun rose again. “And stay away from the Narrows, the cops have been snooping around there lately.” 

David didn’t even offer a verbal response before he was off, jogging down the dark trail through the park. “See ya later, buddy!” Barry called, watching him go. “Group therapy, eh? I’m proud of him.” You only snorted and pat his arm, unwilling to burst his bubble by pointing out the obvious lie. 

The walk home was fast and before you knew it Barry was dressed for work and laying a chaste kiss on your cheek as he went about searching for his work keys. He worked nights at a storage facility down by the docks and kept himself busy by watching the boring security tapes in the office. It was an easy job with decent pay to make one ignore whatever seedy things happened inside the storage containers but the hours meant that your time with him always seemed short. He always made up for it in sweet tiny gifts left for you to wake up to in the morning or to come home to at night. “Have a good night, sweetie,” he beamed, kissing your head again as he stepped out. 

You smiled and watched him head down the hallway. “Have a good night at work, Bar!” You caught his customary kiss blown your way as he disappeared around the corner and shut the door.

Life with Barry was simple, idealistic. It was a slice of the American dream you always wanted to live; a loving wholesome boyfriend, a family, a nice cozy home to return to. By all accounts you should be over the moon, this was all you ever dreamed of and more! And on some level you were, Barry genuinely made you happy but something was… missing. Like a phantom limb you could almost feel it there, between you, until you looked down and realized it never existed. You didn’t want to admit what or who it was, that even long after his death he was still affecting your life. Maybe it was just his death that caused this. You weren’t close - you weren’t even friends- but his death had been traumatic, especially right after you finally started to bond. The bastard had to go and make you care for him before dying. The dick.

Maybe you thought of him because you missed the passion between you and Barry. 

He was such a kind and gentle man but so… safe. He never kissed or touched more than one would frail fragile glass. It was sweet but never satisfied the itch within you, to feel like a wanted woman. The itch Jerome started in you.

Or maybe, worst of all, Jerome really had gotten under your skin. Like a virus he buried himself so deep that no amount of clawing could dig him out. The maniac had wormed himself inside of you, so you could never be free of his grasp, even in death. Perhaps that was why you kept Gacey, why you still woke screaming from nightmares of his grinning face. Why every ginger in a crowd made you panic and your heart stop. 

You flicked on the tv as you began cooking dinner, setting aside enough for Barry and David to have later whenever they returned home. You were used to eating alone thanks to David’s incarceration but that didn’t make it feel any less lonely, less empty. You went about your work, sauteeing onions a the news cut out and the apartment filled with the familiar sound of laughter.

The wooden spoon fell from your hands, clattering to the ground, forgotten as you stared open mouthed at the screen. Your heart was racing and the room spun around you like a mad carousel. 

_“Hellooooo Gotham!”_

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter took so many rewrites and redoes, some with completely different stories going on, and I'm still not sure I'm happy with it. I struggled so much with this chapter and how to go about Jerome's death but I think I at least settled something that wasn't too much. This chapter is an introduction into the next chapter of the reader's life and how Jerome has changed her so I think it at least served that purpose.
> 
> I promise Jerome will be in the next one and I am soooo looking forward to writing him again.
> 
> (Proofreading done by CodyHammond)


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